Out On A Limb… (Out Of My Tree… Out Of My Mind…)
When I was a young boy, I fancied myself as a climber.
From a young age, I was able to brace myself inside door frames, to climb up… Pull myself up onto buffet hutches… and of course, trees were my playground.
My mother often recounted… (although I have no memory of it,) …how frightened she and my Dad would often be, to go into my baby room, and find me climbing around the outside of my baby crib, hanging onto the bars.
It was a strange dichotomy… for although I do not care for heights, and in fact HATE ladders… climbing to the top of a tree holds no concern or fear for me.
In the places I’ve worked, it frequently drew comments from my co-workers, that I would spurn a ladder, and would prefer to climb the shelving itself, if I needed to “get something down.”
Need Cherries picked ? I’m your guy. I’m not the best picker… but I’ll get into the tree where it’s hard to go. (Of course, I eat more than goes in the bucket… but hey… you get what you pay for !!!)
So, I found myself today, in a situation where I wondered how a 47 year old, became trapped in the body of a 12 year old.
My wife had, for years, been speaking of having large spheres of woven Christmas lights, hung in the big Maple tree outside our front door.
This year, after years of discussion, we found a way to make them a reality !
We had also been lucky enough, after Christmas last year, to find some large plastic Ornaments, 9″ – 12″ in size, that would be a nice partner for the lit balls, and would provide some daytime colour, as the LED lights don’t show in daylight.
So, I climbed the tree, trailing a plastic chain, and my wife proceeded to hook on a succession of light strings, illuminated balls, and ornaments, which I pulled up, and suspended, throughout the canopy of the trees branches.
It all went well, and was looking FANTASTIC… until the wind started gusting, as I was at the top of the tree.
Again, I am a 47 year old man.
I have recently lost 30 pounds, and am getting close to my “target weight”.
However…
I weigh a LOT more than I did when I was 12.
Picture if you will, a 175 pound man, in the upper branches of a tree, fighting sudden, but intense gusts of wind, and the top of the tree swaying like a sailor who has had too many tots of Christmas rum.
Suddenly, I was a cringing little boy, holding onto the slender branches with all my might.
The situation was made ever so much more delightful, by my loving wife, who, upon my exclamation of “Holy $%#&” when the first gusts hit… collapsed on the stairs in shrieks of laughter, as the top of the tree was bounced around by subsequent gales.
Her apologies for laughing, between fits of laughter, did little to convince me of her sincerity, or concern for my plight.
But, in that moment, although I was afraid… (and a tad peeved at my laughing wife) … I was exhilarated !
But, I guess that is why mountain climbers climb… why pilots soar… and why I climb trees, all these many years later.
One day, I may get TOO old to climb trees, but I think that day is a long way away…
Next year, the tree is going to look even MORE awesome !!!
Stay tuned !!!
Befuddled…
I am sitting at my desk, about six different windows open, on my two computer screens… and I am befuddled.
I have been blogging for a few months now, on and off… but only in the past few days have I had an opportunity to actually get into the nuts and bolts of WordPress, and have the combination of time and courage necessary, to start messing with my Blog.
Dusty Keyboard
I don’t know if it was my connection timing out, or what happened… but previously, I had made an attempt to change a Theme… and although I spent a few hours on it… nothing was different. There was some sort of error messgae that kept coming up, and so I put it away, and didn’t try it again, until this weekend.
NOW I’m hooked !!!
Must have more widgets… Oh… adjustable width !!! More pages… How do I use the calendar ?!?
I LIKE it !!!
I am trying to poke, and experiment… prod, and try stuff, in hopes that when I encounter someone who really KNOWS what they are doing, that I can use the correct “lingo” to describe what my issues are !!!
That is, in my estimation, the biggest problem with technology…
The Folks who design a System, don’t take into account that someone like me, doesn’t know what they call stuff. Thus, the manual that comes with MOST software, is useless, because unless you know (for example) that a point in a line where it changes velocity is called a NODE… you can’t look it up in the index !!!
Thus, I am sitting at my computer, early on a Monday morning… befuddled and bemused.
I’m not really sure what I’m doing… but I believe my blog is better looking today than it was yesterday… so my baby steps are moving me forward !!!
Now, I wonder what a category is…
Hmmmm….
The Write Time…
BobSongs
Hi !
If you’re reading this… Sorry !!!
I’m a songwriter, and not so much a blogger !
(Although I’ve often told I’m full of… blether…)
I’m trying to write / finish a bunch of songs… but there aren’t enough hours in the day for that… let alone this !!!
So, if you are reading this… Sorry !!!
It just wasn’t the “Write Time” to Blog !!!
Reading The Fine Print…
RCA Victor recording featuring Frank Sinatra
A while ago, my wife’s Aunt was “downsizing” her house… and while we were over for a visit, as she knows I am a music buff… she asked if I wanted to have a look through her old LP records (that otherwise were going to the Sally Ann)
I was delighted, so she showed me where they were, and I started flipping through them.
Most of them were her son’s records… and most of the records were albums that all of us who were around in the 70’s and 80’s have… Foreigner, Asia, Blondie, Toto, etc.
Anyway, I had gone through most of them, when I found an older vintage record… a Big Band album from Tommy Dorsey !
Having grown up in a house where all types of music were welcome, but Big Band or Vera Lynn were especially well received.
I confirmed that this album was “up for grabs”… and brought it home, when we left.
As life often does… things got in the way, and it got put aside until recently, when I came across it, while I was moving stuff around in my studio.
I looked at it, and on the “B” side, in the tiniest letters… with as little “TADA” as possible, it announced that the singer was Frank Sinatra !
Back in the day, before he was “above the title”… Before the Ratpack… Before Frank was Frank !!!
And now, it hangs as in a place of honour on my wall… Serving as a visual reminder that even the great ones were, at one point or another, written in small print.
Now, before you think I am deluded, and relating my talent to FS… Nosiree Bob !!!
I just take it as a reminder that from tiny acorns, mighty Oaks grow.
You just have to read the fine print…
(And what fine print it is !!!)
Sorry, I’m Miss Poke…
What started as a perfectly harmless eveing of Korean BBQ and Soju, spending time with dear friends and colleagues, took a turn for the worse, when someone suggested heading for the Bar in the Hotel Lobby, where a hot band from the Phillipines was playing Hit Cover Songs !
The quality of the singing was quite good… and the keyboard player was doing a great job. Perhaps it was the Soju… maybe the Beer… Perhaps the Scotches ?!? But something was grating on my last nerve, but I couldn’t place it, at first.
But, whatever it was, was getting under my skin something fierce.
Finally, I was able to break the surface of my alcoholic stupor, long enough to realize that we have expectations, which are shaped by the conditions of our environment, and affect how we perceive situations, and thus form “judgements”
Tonight’s renditions were, by no means the worst I’ve heard… that I was able to deal with.
I could deal with the smokey atmosphere… The drunken business men who were openly drooling over the singers… the intoxicated couples slow-dancing totally out of time to the music… the laser lights that occassionally caused blindness… I could deal with ALL of that. What I couldn’t face, was the mangling and twisting of language that was going on.
It started subtly… and with an accent, some of the issues may have been interpretive, rather than real. Roxette’s “Sleeping In My Car” became “Slipping In My Car”, and Ben E. King’s classic “Stand By Me” became what sounded like “Stan, Buy Me” As I say, those could be forgiven, or put down to the songs being sung in a second language.
(My three foreign language songs are Frere Jacques, Allouetta and Mon Payee Blue, so I am ABSOLUTELY throwing rocks inside my Glass House)
As a lyricist, the mangling of words…. whether by a foreign tongue, or by our own malapropism, is something that I find untenable, moreso because they were being paid to perform, and ostensibly, sing. More than a few folks have gotten rich, putting together compilations of “murdered” lyrics… “Scuze Me, While I Kiss This Guy” and such….
But here I was, and there were more than a few songs in a row, where the Lyrics were, apparently, not understood by the singer, and as such, were being abused, but with a ferocity that was hard to endure… so, despite the Whiskey Haze, we knew it was time to go. Kindly, the Destructive Power of Single Malt Scotch, combined with having to re-type this to make it comprehensible, have removed the last vestiges of the worst memories… the next day… Motrin… coffee… and time have cleared most details from my brain… although I know I shall never again hear Stevie Wonders “Overjoyed” without a twitch developing.
And now, hopefully, the song CAN remain the same !!!
Shades Of Gray…
So, let’s get it RIGHT out of the way… I have Gray hair.
Genetically, my physical appearance comes from the Buchanan Clan. I come from a long line of short people, with dark deepset eyes, and black-brown hair, that starts to go gray, then white, in our early 20’s.
I’ve put it out there, and I embrace it… It’s my history… It’s who I am, and the road map that makes up my Genetic Being.
My Genetic Being just got back from a vacation in Las Vegas, where my wife and I had a great time… but we happened to be there at the same time as a large contingent of convention-goers.
The Convention, as I found out later, was the AARP.
The AARP, is the American Association of Retired People.
I believe in Random Acts of Kindness, and helping out where I can… and there were numerous opportunities on our trip, to help folks by explaining touch screens on slot machines, I helped a lady with a bank machine that she wasn’t able to understand, I took a bunch of group photos. I’m not trying to toot my own horn, but my parents raised me to jump to help when I see someone who could use assistance. I want, nor expect kudos… It’s just the right thing to do.
My wife and I were, however, taken aback, when a stranger, OLDER THAN US, on an elevator ride, asked “Are you here with the AARP Conference ?” We said “No”, and at that point, arrived at his floor. We wished him well with his stay, and after the doors closed… looked at each other.
My wife is a wonderful caring, loving lady, and I am her only child… a 47 year old, juvenile delinquent who, on a regular basis, embarrases his nieces, and takes friends outside their comfort zones.
I am far from mature, and waaaay far from retired.
Still smarting from that encounter, I returned home a few days later… and as is my custom on Twitter, I sent out a few #FollowFriday Tweets. One of them, was a 30 Year Old whose comments I found amusing. She sent me back a “Thank you, Sir” tweet. So, I, being an escapee from Juvenile Hall, of course replied… “You’re welcome, Ma’am”
OUCH !!!
I have a healthy belief that we should respect our Elders, and have reverence for the Aged.
However…
I also believe that, while I am (apparently) middle aged, I have done nothing to deserve reverence from folks younger, nor should I be receiving undue respect from folks who are older than I am !!!
I am not yet setting off airport Metal Detectors with my Iron Supplements… nor am I using furniture or bedding with motors to “help me” get comfortable and increase circulation. I do not own a scooter. I do not seek to eat dinner in the middle of the afternoon. I have never asked “those darn kids” to turn down their music… (although my wife has often asked me “What the %$#% are you listening to ?!?”)
I feel that my actions and my attitude reflect my younger self… by which I mean no disrespect to our older citizens… I just ain’t ONE OF THEM !!!
I guess my problem is the opposite of what Rodney Dangerfield (young kids say “who ?”) used to say…
I get TOO MUCH respect !!!